Enitza Templeton, former tradwife turned influential headbanger on the coercive control she identifies in the tradwife lifestyle. She uses her platform vigorously to challenge and expose these injustices. Through this transition, her path exemplifies a broader societal move away from accepting conventional gender norms toward defying them. She highlights the complicated realities of a movement that has been largely romanticized. Templeton lived as a tradwife for more than a decade. Even though on the outside her life looked amazing, she was suffocated and “extremely dead inside.”
Templeton grew up in an evangelical Christian home, her parents being Puerto Rican immigrants, where her father was a minister. For a decade, she lived the tradwife lifestyle to the max. It wasn’t until 2019 that she left her marriage—encouraged by her supportive friend, who helped guide her through the process. She’s an advocate now, using her platform to raise awareness and tell her story. She cautions young women, such as social media influencer Cali, against the seductive lifestyle that can result in emotional and physical abuse.
Tradwives advocate a return to traditional gender roles, with women focusing on being homemakers and mothers. Templeton contends that this ideal is mostly available to upper and middle-class white women. She argues that the idealized 1950s housewife standard leaves too many women out, especially women of color, and low-income women.
“You don’t see tradwives in their 40s.” – Enitza Templeton
Templeton’s real issue seems to be with the way the movement encourages women to submit to their husbands. This dynamic shapes the communities in which coercive control can flourish. She points out that this filing is anchored in religious doctrines that connect women’s salvation to their husband’s happiness. Yet for Templeton, this dynamic is more than a relic concept. It is an immediate and dangerous threat to women’s privacy and health.
The aim is not to win people over to your ideology, the aim is to make disciples. In this manner, the girls are raised to serve and the boys are raised to lead. Up to this point,” she says. This view illustrates the repetitive aspect to the tradwife ideology. Daughters are often just as groomed to walk in their mothers’ footprints, without a second thought given to what that truly means.
Templeton’s own experiences as a tradwife were full of contradictions. She remembers a very idealized family life, living well, very beautiful curtains, and a lovely, warm fireplace. However, beneath this façade lay profound dissatisfaction. When she looks back on those decisions, her heart is now burdened. The understanding that she was consciously making those choices and she was wrong chews her up inside.
Her motivation to quit was driven by an effort to set a positive example for her kids. She’s adamant about how, “I chose to be the mom I wished to be over the wife he envisioned. She is just as deeply committed to change in her personal life. She purposely tries to rewire her kids’ perceptions about gender and independence.
“If I want my daughters to do any different, I’m going to have to show them different.” – Enitza Templeton
Templeton’s contentious current relationship shows how far she’s come from the tradwife movement. She has talked a hard line on the issue of marriage, previously saying she would never marry her long-time boyfriend. Rather, she argues for a relationship of mutuality—and not the hierarchical mutuality of conventional land acknowledgments.
Templeton found happiness and purpose. Through graphic design classes at a community college in Kansas, Templeton discovered a new passion. Continuing her upward career and professional trajectory, she secured a position within an executive suite. Inspired by ideas of home and safety, this pivot opened up economic freedom for her. Maybe most importantly, it allowed her to emancipate herself from the stifling presence of her old way of life.
Templeton remains unrepentant, and has become one of America’s foremost anti-tradwife voices. She’s currently working on producing more of this counter content in an effort to tear down the building momentum of the tradwife movement. She’s a force on the ground, leading social media campaigns and talking publicly about her experience. By sharing her story, she empowers others to go against the golden girl standards of the tradwife myth.
Cali, a young influencer embracing the tradwife lifestyle, has attracted criticism from Templeton and others who worry about the implications of promoting such ideals. Templeton contends that young women cannot fully understand the hazards posing threat to their lives pursuing such a lifestyle.
“So all of your performance, all of your cooking, all of your serving to your husband, if it’s not good enough, well, where’s your eternal salvation going to be? That’s a f
