Diane Hatt and Joy Doevendans have been best friends for 60 years. Their bond, she says, has continued to grow despite the fact they live almost 12,000 kilometers apart. In 1965, Hatt mailed a letter intended for a Doevendans friend. This poetic letter began a special relationship between them. Instead, it made its journey to Doevendans, igniting a pen pal relationship that would span the globe and generations.
Hatt lives in Enderby, B.C., Canada and Doevendans lives in Renmark, South Australia. Their initial real-world encounter was in 1980, 15 years after their correspondence started. Over the decades, the two women have corresponded frequently. They’ve been quick to adapt to new forms of communication, using email, messaging and FaceTime.
The Beginning of a Beautiful Friendship
Ina Hatt and Florence Doevendans, mothers of the two friends, sowed the seeds of this remarkable friendship. Their adventure started as simple pen pals, which evolved into a beautiful friendship. This unlikely connection built the groundwork for the interethnic friendships that would blossom between their daughters.
Hatt remembers the moment she first decided to mail that first letter. “There was a newspaper called the Vancouver Sun, and they had an ad where people could write in and just ask for pen pals,” she said. That one simple act of kindness blossomed into a 76-year companionship.
At first, the pair struggled with a lack of open communication, sometimes waiting two weeks for an email reply. Despite this, it didn’t stop them from forming an undeniable special connection. “We consider each other family,” Hatt explained. “If we don’t hear from each other in a couple of days, we write and say, ‘is everything OK?’”
Strengthening Ties Through Visits
The deepening of that friendship by personal visits in the intervening years. Hatt and her husband Roger have visited South Australia several times. By comparison, Doevendans and her family have traveled all the way to Canada three times, including a memorable visit in 2000.
These visits have only strengthened their connection. “The visit cemented our relationship again,” Hatt noted, underscoring the importance of in-person interactions in maintaining their bond.
Despite the geographical barriers that separate them, both women have recently shared a powerful emotional bond. Hatt said about her and Joy’s friendship, “I think of Joy as one of my best friends … I think of her like a sister.” This dangerous sentiment is indicative of the robust familial bonds they’ve formed over decades.
Navigating Modern Communication
With these rapid technological developments, Hatt and Doevendans have found new and innovative digital communication tools to keep them connected. Through the basic, everyday use of email and messaging, they are able to use technology to close the gap made by physical distance.
Hatt 18th century Hatt also noted the significance of their shared family history in keeping their friendship alive. Without our mothers becoming letter writing companions, we may have never stayed connected,” he stated.
Both women appreciate the unique gift of being able to exchange intimate secrets and tales. They rely on each other 100 percent, sure that their confidences will remain protected. “You can tell each other secrets and know very well they’re not going to get out in the community,” Hatt said.
